Party of Jesus

The Lieutenant Governor of South Carolina flaunted his Party of Jesus Family Values this week with a comment he made about financial assistance given to poor people.

"My grandmother was not a highly educated woman, but she told me as a small child to quit feeding stray animals. You know why? Because they breed! You're facilitating the problem if you give an animal or a person ample food supply. They will reproduce, especially ones that don't think too much further than that."

As a representative of the Party of Jesus Andre Bauer incorporates the true essence of Party of Jesus Family Values, he treasures and deeply cares about multi-millionaires, billionaires, and the corporations they use to collect cash from poor people.

But of course if those poor people do end up reproducing they will be buying Pampers, toys, toddler's clothes, and all sorts of products made by corporations owned by Republicans. So even though it does violate Party of Jesus values to show compassion for less fortunate people, at least this type of personal weakness will eventually make money for Party of Jesus supporters.

The Party of Jesus suffered yet another defeat today when a woman that is not even Caucasian was confirmed by the US Senate as the next justice to serve on the US Supreme Court. I mean, she's not even white!

These are lean days for the Party of Jesus as they are forced, over and over again, to suffer defeat at the hands of an enemy that does not even use homophobia or fear tactics to whip up support from dumbasses.

Even with their armies of Limbaugh-loving thugs that recently disrupted Democratic House members in their home districts the Rethuglicans still don't seem able to win at anything except disruption and the fear of a queer planet.

But really, it's bad enough that they had to stomach having another woman on the court, one that is not even a millionaire, but a Hispanic woman? It's no wonder their hero Limpblob is fit to be tied. It's almost enough to make you feel sorry for the tools of big business and the Jeebus industry, not quite, but almost. Ok, not at all.

Technorati Tags: Sotomayor, Supreme Court, Hispanic woman, Party of Jesus, Republican, Rethuglican, racism, Limbaugh

About 20 years ago the Republican Party entered into the sacrament of Holy Marriage with the Religious Right, it was at this time that they became, for all practical purposes, the Party of Jesus. Today a very high percentage of elected Party of Jesus legislators are actively Bible thumping idiots, for example Sally Kern in Oklahoma and Michele Bachmann in Minnesota. These people are so completely driven by their Jeebus-brand Sanctity of Bigotry that they do not even realize how obvious is their insanity to rational, normal people.

More and more, as issues relating to civil rights and immigration are splashed across the headlines, the ultra-right wing loonies in the Party of Jesus open their mouths and destroy even more of the tiny bit of credibility still maintained by their wingnut political organization.

Of course the real, actual agenda of the Party of Jesus has always been to steal from the poor and give to the rich. Back, oh so many years ago, when they entered into a sacred union with the fundietards of America, the billionaires who actually run the party figured it would be great to sucker in a bunch of religious bigots who had already demonstrated their high degree of gullibility by ordering their lives around an ancient book of scrolls from a warring, genocidal, primitive middle-eastern tribe.

Time after time mega-rich Party of Jesus candidates have spooned out the bigotry during their campaigns, but failed to deliver the fag crushing blows they promised once they were elected. These are the original Republicans, the billionaires and the tools of the billionaires.

What the über-greedy, wealthy, traditional Republicans failed to anticipate was the way the bigots for Jeebus would infiltrate their organization and force it to become a political group of the bigots, by the bigots, and for the Holy Bigot Warriors of Jeebus.

Now we have a situation where it has become perfectly obvious to the rational majority of Americans that the Party of Jesus is really the Party of Nutjobs. And so, we believe, it is the end result of the marriage between billionaire manipulators and bigoted fools that has brought the Party of Jesus to its present day crisis. Perhaps they are reaping as they have sown.

Technorati Tags: Sally Kern, Michele Bachmann, Party of Jesus, Sanctity of Bigotry, Billionaires, wingnuts, bigotry, Jesus

A long term Party of Jesus operative, Chip Saltsman, who handled the Presidential campaign of Governor Mike Huckleberrybee, has released a CD as campaign materials in his effort to become the new national chairman of the Party of Jesus.

The CD contains a musical track entitled Barack the Magic Negro that clearly and accurately represents and illuminates the true nature of Party of Jesus theology. Racism is just one of the many forms of intolerance that is cherished by the truly devout among the Party of Jesus faithful. Let's not forget heterosexism, paternalism, homophobia and jingoism, the other pillars of Party of Jesus dogma.

In an effort to demonstrate his commitment to equal opportunity racism, the Party of Jesus candidate also included the song The Star Spanglish Banner, these tracks and others were created by an employee of the famous hate monger and moron Rush Limpblob.

It seems odd that the Party of Jesus would be trying to increase their recruitment among the bigot community, since every racist pig in the country already votes Jesus. Maybe Chip Saltsman has not noticed yet that the racist pigs he identifies as his constituency are outnumbered by decent citizens who vote on the basis of qualifications for office, not race or ethnic background. We suggest everybody chips in to get a bigger shovel for Chip, he truly does represent the core values of the Party of Jesus.

Technorati Tags: Barack the Magic Negro, Chip Saltsman, The Star Spanglish Banner, Mike Huckleberrybee, Party of Jesus, Republican National Committee, Rush Limpblob, racism, Republican Party, sexism, Republicans, homophobia, Jesus

At a recent devoutly Party of Jesus anti-gay hatefest convention sponsored by American Values and Focus Fascists of the Family Action, racist souvenir cartons of Obama Waffle mix were offered for sale. Party of Jesus clergyman Newt "Family Values" Gingrich, who had an extra-marital affair while hounding Bill Clinton for extra marital sex, and former Massachusetts Governor Mitt "Homophobia" Romney were speakers at this Party of Jesus convention celebrating holy intolerance and sacred anti-gay propaganda.

It is no longer socially acceptable to blatantly express racist bigotry in public in this country, this is why Party of Jesus candidates and religious hate groups cling so desperately to the Sanctity of Anti-Gay Bigotry. It's still perfectly acceptable to slander gay people, lie about gay people, support ballot measures intended to harm gay people, and do other Jesus-approved nasty things to fags and dykes.

But maybe the wealthy, greedy, avaricious, Jesus-brand white guys at this recent hate convention went a tiny bit overboard with the Obama racist waffle mix. What do you think?

Technorati Tags: racism, Republican, bigotry, Christian, Focus on the Family, homophobia, anti-gay, slander, Obama, Aunt Jemima